What am I going to do with this giant zucchini?

*snort*

Anyhoots, when my landlord goes out of town, I am allowed to go out back and legitimately rape the garden for produce that will be overripe by the time he gets back.  Today's haul was just this one gigantic zucchini. 

Honey Bear included for reference.

I feel like this photo taken with my Commodore 64 cell phone is not doing justice to the massive amounts of zucchini I must now consume.  I'm thinking zucchini bread or just the normal cook it with oil and onions.  Or!  Oh!  Once I made zucchini parmesan and I breaded it and baked it, but then the zucchini was so good I didn't even bother with pasta and tomato sauce.  

I ate the hell out of it.  

With ketchup.

Mostly I just wanted to practice uploading pictures.  And write a post with a pervy headline.  Get used to it.